Saturday, 9 May 2015

A Sense of Imagination

You may remember, and if not the evidence is right here for you, that I recently mentioned needing to find some way of growing an extra limb in order to cope with the whirlwind that is having a third child.  By the way, all the people who have said that having a third is , like, really really hard compared to just having two, I'd like to introduce you to my doctor who has a bill for you for all the anxiety medication I am having to take at the moment.  Sorry about that, back to the point, I mentioned that I would need another arm to keep them all under control.  Well, it turns out that I have the perfect Marvellian (real word?  I'm not sure but I'm going with it) mad scientist to perfect my third arm.

You see, I have a four year old daughter, and I don't know why no comic book writer has picked up on this, but four year olds have the best imaginations, the weirdest grasp on reality ever, and the inability to ever stop talking.  This leads to some really strange sentences coming out of their speech holes.

We were just sitting eating tea, I thinking I was helping S to consume more grapes than are safe for one small human, when N decided, apropos of absolutely nothing at all (I assume there had been some conversation with her mother at some point during the day regarding this, but it hadn't happened in the hour and a half that I had been home) to list the senses.  In what is a particularly impressive feat she managed to name 5 of them.  In what was slightly less impressive they weren't all quite right.  This is the list that she just launched into mid me stuffing S's mouth with small green objects:

Growing Hair
Perhaps she had Medusa in mind?
You will note the very close correlation with the list you would find in any good school textbook. 4 out of 5 isn't bad at all.  The final one however leaves me in some doubt that N has grasped the basic principles of exactly what the senses are.  I do wonder though.  Perhaps she just knows something I don't?  Perhaps she's ahead of her time?  And soon we are going to be hearing about scientists who have developed a way of getting people to see through the ends of their hair.  Better that than that they've found a way to get people to taste through the follicles on their head, though that might explain why S seems to keep a supply of the stickiest, slimiest foodstuffs as a carpet for his bonce.  Anyway, remember you heard it here first.Now I'm just off to find out if she's perfected my third arm yet?


  1. I thought you had deserted us again!! Phew!! What's with the "small green objects" - are you practising for "Just a Minute"? Good luck with the arm.

    1. Sorry for the delay! Yes, repetition is absolutely disallowed around here.